Yuto staggered to his feet, gasping for breath. After flushing away what he had just vomited, he stumbled toward the sink.

A terrible ordeal.

Yes, it had been truly terrible. His ragged breathing echoed off the restroom’s tiled walls. Barely managing to stop at the sink, Yuto glared at his reflection.

His face was pale. His eyes were dull, his lips bloodless. Not a trace remained of the smile that had charmed the nobles at the party. The mirror now reflected a weak, pathetic idiot who had worn a mask and grinned like a clown even with his hated enemy standing before him.

GRIND.

Yuto clenched his teeth. Shiro’s face kept rising in his mind. That benevolent smile, those warm eyes. The words that bastard had whispered repeated themselves in his ears.

His stomach seemed to twist again. He had thrown up everything he had eaten, yet it still felt as though something remained inside.

And something did remain. His hatred and murderous intent toward Shiro were still there, undiminished. Those already immense emotions had swollen even further today.

‘I want to kill him.’

Yuto clenched his fists so tightly that his nails dug into his palms.

When Shiro handed him a glass, he swallowed it down.

When Shiro laid a hand on Shirin’s shoulder, he swallowed it down.

When Shiro offered to make Elun his attendant, he swallowed it down.

When Shiro asked to be friends, he swallowed it down.

Every time Shiro breathed, every time he smiled, every time he spoke.

Yuto swallowed the rising urge to kill, again and again and again. For hours, all that murderous intent had been piling up in his stomach.

He had drunk refreshments and eaten sweet cake, but tasted nothing. Throughout the party, the only flavor in his mouth had been the metallic tang of blood.

‘He smiled at me.’

Yuto’s reflection twisted.

‘After abandoning his own sister and stabbing her to death, he put his hand on Shirin’s shoulder and smiled. He acted as if she were the dearest family he had in the world.’

The murderous intent rising from his stomach writhed. With a palm beaded with blood, Yuto clutched at his pounding chest.

‘He prattled on about being friends. I wanted to rip out his tongue. I wanted to crush that benevolent smile that fools the whole world. I wanted to gouge out those fucking eyes staring at me and grind them underfoot.’

The blood inside him was too hot. He felt an urge to lash out right then, just to cool that heat.

Shirin’s face came to mind.

["We’ll see each other again at the academy, won’t we?"]

She had smiled as she said it.

["Don’t forget what I told you earlier."]

Her eyes had been steeped in concern for him as she whispered those words. Despite having met him for the first time that day, Shirin had worried about him. He had not been the only one reluctant for their dance to end.

The face he had seen today overlapped with her face from his previous life, coughing up blood as she died. The mirror reflected the face of the idiot who had been able to do nothing but watch her die. Who had failed to kill her murderer. An idiot who had still done nothing, who had forced himself to smile at his enemy and see him off, only to torment himself with self-loathing once he was alone.

CRASH!

Yuto’s fist smashed the mirror. Gasping, he sank to the floor.

"..."

He stared blankly down at the fist that had broken the mirror. The glass shards had failed to cut his skin, but he had struck so hard that the skin over his knuckles had split. Blood dripped from them.

"Ha ha..."

Yuto laughed quietly and shook his head.

"Now I really am an idiot. Pathetic bastard..."

He rose with those self-mocking words. Washing his blood-soaked fist under the tap, he thought,

‘Don’t get emotional.’

He repeated it to himself.

‘This isn’t like before. I know who Shiro is. I may not know exactly what he wants, but I know his true nature.’

In his previous life, he had failed to recognize Shiro’s true nature until the moment of his betrayal.

‘I fell for it because I didn’t know. I trusted Shiro because I didn’t know.’

He had considered Shiro a comrade and a brother. That trust had left him open to a devastating betrayal, and Yuto had lost everything that night.

‘This time is different. I know his true nature. I know he’ll use me and betray me at the worst possible moment. I have the advantage in information.’

Cold water from the tap seeped into his wounds. His hot blood cooled.

‘I can’t let myself get emotional. Shiro isn’t ruled by his feelings. He’s coldheaded. He never lets anything cloud his judgment, no matter the situation. If I let my emotions control me against someone like that—it’ll be no different from my previous life.’

He had made a pact with the Void and returned to the past.

There would be no next time. If he died again, that would be the end. Yuto turned off the tap and roughly bound his fist with a handkerchief.

‘Swallow the urge to kill.’

Yuto slowly steadied his breathing.

‘I don’t have to discard it. Just swallow it. So Shiro won’t notice. Swallow it deep down inside me and hide it.’

His pounding heart settled. His murderous intent toward Shiro went dormant deep within him. There, it would freeze cold and solid. Until the day he could kill Shiro.

Yuto looked into the mirror above the next sink. His skin was still pale, his eyes dull, his lips dry.

There was nothing he could do about that. He tried forcing the corners of his mouth upward. His muscles would not quite obey. His desire to smile clashed with his body’s refusal. Once, twice, three times. Only after several attempts did the corners of his mouth finally lift.

It was an awkward smile, far from the perfect one he had worn at the party.

For now, this would do. Shiro, the person he needed to be most wary of, had already left. The party was drawing to a close, and few nobles remained. He only needed to play the clown for them a little longer.

Yuto straightened his clothes and tidied his hair. His bandaged fist throbbed. A glance showed that blood was already seeping through the handkerchief.

"I’ll need an excuse for this first."

He muttered as he put on a fresh mask.

* * *

Levian and Elun were still waiting for Yuto near the dessert table.

"Sorry I took so long."

Yuto spoke with a smile. He had barely managed to produce it, but the banquet hall’s dimmed lighting concealed its awkwardness. Levian watched him with worried eyes, then her gaze stopped on his right hand.

"Wh-what happened to your hand?"

"Oh, this."

Yuto offered the excuse he had prepared.

"I suppose today’s party took more out of me than I expected. The restroom floor was a little slippery, too."

"What?"

"I slipped. Put my hand against the mirror, but I wasn’t very lucky. The mirror broke, my hand got cut, and here we are."

Levian stared at him, her mouth hanging open. Of course she knew he was lying, but she did not ask for the truth.

"..."

There was no shortage of things she wanted to ask. She did not know everything about Yuto, but she knew something of him. The Yuto she knew was a surviving member of Belkain’s royal family. Nor was he someone given to being kind to others and smiling readily.

Yuto had told many lies today, but Levian had no intention of asking why. She believed leaving it alone was best for him.

"If you’re not feeling well, go back and rest."

"But the party isn’t over yet."

"Yes, it is."

Levian surveyed the nobles remaining in the banquet hall.

"The important people House Marigold needs to concern itself with, the ones you need to smile for, left some time ago. All that’s left here are flatterers hoping to leech off House Marigold. And nobodies hoping to establish a connection with you, now that not only our house but the Ristal royals owe you a debt."

"That’s rather harsh."

"My point is that there’s no need to care what they think. That goes for you too, Yuto. You don’t need to force a smile and waste your breath talking to them. Go back to your room with Elun and rest."

Levian strode up to him and seized his right wrist. Quickly unwinding the handkerchief, she let out a disbelieving laugh at the sight of his blood-covered fist.

"What an unusual way to put your hand against a mirror."

"It just happened that way."

"You said the restroom floor was slippery? I’ll have to fire the cleaner."

"Now that I think about it, it wasn’t slippery. I was just dizzy and lost my footing."

"Yes, let’s go with that."

Levian cupped his right hand in both of hers, her lips moving. As befitted Maria Academy’s top healing student, she healed his hand with an incantation alone, without even holding a staff.

"Now go back to your room and rest. I’ll explain to Father."

"I could at least say goodbye..."

"I said, go back."

Levian glared at him as she snapped the words. Yuto shrugged and nodded.

"Thank you."

"No need to thank me. Thanks to you, I’ve made connections with the illustrious prince and princess of Ristal."

The corners of Yuto’s mouth twitched. His new mask was not as flawless as the earlier one. Perhaps—perhaps it was because he was with Levian. They had been through so much in Belkain, and he had shown her so much.

"..."

Levian watched him for a moment, then heaved a sigh.

‘He dislikes the Ristal royals.’

She did not ask him directly, but guessed at the reason from what she knew. Yuto was a surviving royal of Belkain. And although the Kingdom of Ristal had promised to protect Belkain, it had failed to stop the Black Mages from taking root there.

‘That’s probably why.’

Even when people knew something had been unavoidable, their hearts did not always obey. Should she apologize? No, it would be better to pretend she had not noticed. Having reached that conclusion, Levian lifted her skirts and curtsied.

"Thank you for all the effort you put in today, Yuto. This party is ending now, but someday, at another party—please dance with me too."

The image of Yuto dancing with Shirin earlier flickered through her mind. The uncomfortable ache in her chest was still there. Suppressing that inexplicable feeling, Levian gave him a bright smile.

"I’m quite confident in my dancing, you know."

Yuto smiled again. This time, it was genuine, not forced.

"Of course. There’ll be parties at the academy, too."

Yuto held out his hand to her. Levian merely blinked, making no move to offer hers in return. He chuckled and drew her wrist toward him.

His lips brushed the back of her hand.

"Thank you for being considerate."

Levian must have had many questions, yet she had not pressed him. Yuto was aware of that.

At the touch against the back of her hand, Levian’s mouth fell open. Just as her face began to turn scarlet, Yuto released her hand and turned away.

"You really do go to every length."

Elun muttered as she followed Yuto out of the banquet hall.

"Are you trying to make her forget your disgraceful display?"

"I was simply expressing my thanks."

"You seem to think those shriveled lips of yours can serve as thanks. How arrogant."

"I can’t dance with her right now."

Elun snorted at his answer.

"I felt your emotions surge. Do you intend to smash something every time they run wild?"

"I’ve gotten a hold of myself."

"You will have to prove that from now on. Shiro Ristal will not pretend not to notice out of consideration for your feelings, as Levian did."

"I know."

Yuto answered as he touched his face, where he no longer felt any pain.

"I didn’t expect to meet Shiro today. That’s why I was so shaken. But things will be different at the academy."

"..."

"I won’t act perfectly. Perfection would only make him suspicious. I’ll show him only the openings I intend to show, and deceive him. I’ll let him use me, and use him in return."

"Yuto. I trust you."

Elun murmured.

"I have no choice. We have a pact, and we use each other. I must remain a pitiable, ignorant girl before Shiro Ristal, so I cannot help you."

"Shiro will try to control you through Shirin."

"I know. But what could I possibly do, having lost my memories to the Black Mages’ human experiments? What he thinks he controls is merely that pitiful girl, not my true self."

Elun quickened her steps to draw alongside him. She looked up at him with a frown.

"I trust you, and you trust me. But Flokiro, that stupid beast, cannot be trusted. Just today, he nearly bared his fangs at Shiro Ristal."

"We weren’t prepared to meet him today."

"Make certain he is fully prepared before we enter the academy. If that beast ruins the perfection of our performance, I will not forgive him."

"You underestimate Flokiro. He’s a warrior too. He knows how to hide his emotions. If he sets his mind to it."

"Hmph. Nothing I saw today gives me any faith in that."

"There’s no need to worry."

Yuto smiled wryly and placed a hand on her head. Elun twisted slightly as if she disliked it, but her resistance was feeble. He stroked her hair.

"Tell that... beast that if he cannot control his emotions, he will never eat cake again."

Elun murmured with her eyes narrowed, feeling his hand on her head. Yuto chuckled and nodded.

"I’ll tell him."

The orchestra’s music drifting from the distant banquet hall gradually fell silent.

The party was over.