"You don't regret it?"

At Kim Taegyun's question, I raised my head. Realizing what he meant, he belatedly added the subject he'd left out.

"Deciding to sponsor them."

In his hand was an unlit cigarette.

"Put the cigarette away."

"Huh? Why?"

"I told you I quit smoking."

"... You were going back and forth about quitting in the group chat, but you're actually doing it?"

"Of course I'm actually doing it. Did you think I was joking?"

At my words, Kim Taegyun opened and closed his mouth like a fish. It wasn't something I couldn't understand. Until recently, I was a smoker who went through at least a pack a day. Half a year ago, I smoked two packs a day, and sometimes even three when things were bad.

"Since when?"

"A month ago?"

"Damn, crazy. For real?"

Was there anything more certain than quitting smoking to give the feeling of starting a new life? That was the reason behind my sudden cessation, and it was also the driving force that allowed me to endure until now.

I snatched the cigarette from the dumbfounded Kim Taegyun's hand and shoved a carrot stick into it instead. Unexpectedly forced to hold an orange vegetable, Kim Taegyun made a bewildered face.

"You can just quit overnight like that?"

"Turns out I can."

Honestly, I was itching for one. But a man has his pride; how could I pitifully start smoking again after declaring I'd quit?

Especially when my father was personally preparing carrot sticks for me every single day.

"You crazy bastard..."

"Instead of saying that, you should quit smoking now too. You're the only smoker left among us."

"No, how am I supposed to do that? The guys who actually manage to quit are the weird ones!"

"What nonsense. You just don't have any patience."

I wrapped the crushed cigarette in a piece of tissue I carried around, then popped a carrot stick into my own mouth. The crunchy texture was good as a cigarette substitute, and as a palate cleanser.

"What a totally crazy bastard..."

Seeing that, Kim Taegyun eventually put the carrot stick in his mouth. "Is this even good?" I thought this every time, but it really was funny how a guy crazy about tea leaves absolutely hated vegetables.

"I don't regret it."

Furthermore, about the sponsorship... At first, I wondered if it was the right thing to do, but now I was certain. I would never have any reason to regret this.

"Even after you suffered so much?"

Kim Taegyun hesitated, turning his head away as he blurted out the question. Even though I knew he couldn't see it, I nodded.

"Yeah, even after I suffered."

"Fuck, fuck. You're, you're really..."

Crunch, crunch. The carrot stick crumbled into fine pieces in my mouth and disappeared.

"You're a real pushover."

"I guess so."

"Who cares about the perpetrator's kid... let alone the victim..."

"But that kid was too young to be left all alone."

"Their remaining family will take good care of them!"

"They don't have any. I looked into it. Besides their dad who went to prison, that kid has zero family."

And I was the one who sent that kid's only family member to prison. It was my parents who pulled the strings so he would receive the maximum possible prison sentence without any settlement.

"Why the fuck did you even look into that!"

"Right. Why did I look into it."

In truth, I wasn't really sorry about not settling.

Of course, that man serving a prison sentence was his own karma in the end. Considering he shattered my dreams and completely dragged my life through the mud, receiving the maximum sentence was only a fitting, perhaps even insufficient, price to pay.

"... There are plenty of other kids. There are countless kids left all alone, whether because their parents died or went to prison. But why that kid of all people? Why, why the child of the bastard who did that shit to you..."

But what about the child left behind like that? What about that kid who now has to live all alone?

What sin did that kid commit, having no choice but to rely on a guy like that to survive just because he was family?

"But I already saw them."

There was no reason for me to take responsibility. I knew that. It wasn't my fault that the kid ended up like that, nor did I have any obligation to embrace them. I was merely a victim.

But...

"I already... found out they exist."

But yeah. I couldn't help but care.

I really couldn't help it.

"How could I turn a blind eye to that."

It was truly unavoidable that I was the type of person who couldn't be happy while shouldering someone else's misfortune.

"Idiot."

"I know."

"Pushover bastard."

"A bit, yeah."

"... You really don't regret it?"

"Yeah."

Therefore, I smiled at my blurry friend.

"I learned from you guys how precious unrewarded devotion is, and how desperately a hand reached out during the hardest times is needed. Having learned that, how could I regret it?"

Or perhaps I was smiling at the one peeking into my memories.

My friend's face crumbled away.

.

.

.

「Would it have been better if you were a selfish person? If you were someone who only cared about yourself, if you were, I...」

I blinked at the distant darkness.

Whether I had slept, dreamed, or watched many things. It was a bizarre sensation.

「I don't know what the best choice was.」

But even with such a sensation, even in a world filled entirely with darkness.

「I, I thought that was the only way back then.」

The entity in front of me, at least, was clearly visible.

「... But one thing is certain, it's that you are a good person. A person far too good to be the opponent of our bet.」

Ash-gray hair untainted by anything else, and pale cheeks. Eyes of the same color on both sides. A neat attire reminiscent of a formal uniform. And...

「That's why I want to make sure you, at least, can return.」

And...

「Resent me for not telling you anything. It truly is all my fault. Your hardships, trials, and adversity are all to blame on me. I really am the cause. Everything, everything is because I'm a bad person.」

... Ah. I see.

「So... please don't try to find out any more. You only need to resent me. Do not learn anything beyond that.」

You, you're just...

「Ignorance will save you.」

Just...

「... I'm sorry.」

I didn't avoid the approaching hand. It might have been closer to 'couldn't', but that wasn't very important.

My vision abruptly faded to black. It was another fall.

* * *

Ah, it's convenient that the parts of the memory to be erased are already predetermined. Tsk. Do you know how annoying it was last time...

「...」

Why the long face? You're the one who decided this. Or are you pretending to be pitiful to buy Gretchen's sympathy?

「Shut up. I know full well I don't deserve sympathy. I was just... just... Forget it. I'd rather bite my tongue and die than exchange words with a bastard like you.」

Oh... Then you should bite your tongue and die right now, shouldn't you? Wow, I'd be so grateful.

「Piss off, maggot.」

Don't forget. The humans are leaving the vessel alone for now, but if an execution is carried out again before we leave this area, then...

「...」

Heh. More importantly, I'm really looking forward to seeing how Gretchen will react. Will he really refuse the execution even after losing his memories and hearing the fact of his rampage from the humans' mouths?

「... Wait, don't tell me you did that too?」

Foolish thing, I definitely made it a condition of the bet. That I would not tolerate any form of threat until we leave this area.

「This is a scam!」

What are you talking about. It's your fault for failing to set the terms properly, how does this make it a scam?

「You...!」

More importantly, ah. He's finally waking up. Now then, how will this play out?

* * *

'Open your eyes, idiot. I already told them all to execute me, so just go along with it. Like the pushover you always are!'

RATTLE. As soon as I woke up, the sound of metal dug into my ears. I unconsciously tried to open my eyelids, but the attempt itself failed due to something pressing down on my eyes.

It was a moment that brought a sense of déjà vu.

CLINK.

I slightly twisted my body just in case. I didn't feel like I was lying down, but rather sitting... but there was no sensation in my limbs. That is to say, I was definitely putting strength into them, but it didn't feel like they were moving, and even attempting the action itself felt incredibly difficult.

My cheeks were pressed and pulled taut around my mouth, making me wonder if I was biting down on something.

"Mmm?"

The problem was that this, too, felt somehow familiar.

Right, this sensation was exceptionally similar to something I experienced about 150 chapters ago. Especially in the sense that my limbs were bound and I seemed to have a gag in my mouth—

"What is it?"

"No, it's just, it looked like he moved..."

—Wait, no. This wasn't just on a similar level; wasn't this actually it? Wasn't I genuinely restrained right now?

I realized that a new voice was piercing through my ringing ears. A human's voice. My thoughts spun rapidly.

The last thing I did? Getting beat up by a lava demon and firing a flare, bang.

After that? Dunno.

Then the reason why I'm currently restrained (presumably)? I'd like to say dunno for this too... but honestly, the possible reasons were limited. I probably flew into another rage and went on a rampage. Granted, I didn't actually have any memories of a rage being triggered in my head, but anyway.

Regardless, the fact that I could hear voices around me and was suppressed and restrained could be interpreted as the incident being over. That much, at least, was a huge relief.

To be honest, right up until I collapsed, I thought it wouldn't be strange if it ended with the city being completely wiped out. But seeing as they had the manpower to subdue and lock me up, it seemed they had at least avoided total annihilation. Yeah. It's a relief after all. A real relief.

"... He isn't moving, though?"

"Was it my imagination...?"

Now then, what should I do? Should I listen to the surrounding sounds and gather information, or just let them know I'm awake?

I debated with myself before ultimately choosing the latter. It was too suffocating to stay in this state for long. My neck, my neck especially felt incredibly tight.

RATTLE.

"Ah! He's moving!"

"H-He's awake!"

"... U-Uh?"

I moved my head to scratch my itchy neck. Something was definitely caught around my neck; every time my shoulder and cheek touched, something hard caught in the neck area. I felt suffocated.

CLANK!

"Boss!?"

It's itchy. More than that, I can't breathe. It's suffocating. I'm suffocating. Someone undo this. I don't need anything else, just my neck, please...

THUD!

"Boss!"

Would it have been better if at least my hands were free? But even touching my neck with my hands was impossible.

I turned my head this way and that, squirming my body, before falling straight forward.

RATTLE. While a dull pain reached my shoulder and head, the sound of metal echoed dizzily.

"Damn it! Boss! Boss, can you hear me!?"

"W-What. Why is he doing that?"

I hate this. I hate it. This is seriously.

I'm suffocating.

"Wai@#$% Ope#$@#$&&#$!"

"#@$^! Gra@$@%*$him!"

"#*%&@#$@#&%!!"

"@@#*@#&@&$@%!"

RATTLE. RATTLE.

"@#$%&%%^#$!"

"#$^&$@#@!"

"#@%&$^#$—!"

I flailed around in my helplessness. I couldn't, I couldn't breathe properly. I needed to breathe through my nose, and my nose definitely wasn't blocked...

But it felt like my neck, my neck was being strangled.

"#@%^%$#$!"

Meanwhile, one of the dozens of sounds moving back and forth drew closer. Something pressed down on my body. I hate this. I moved my body to shake them off. But there were several hands, and one of them grabbed my neck.

CLICK.

One of the things caught around my neck disappeared. Finally.

"Und$%#@."

"Don't#@%%@#$."

In addition, the pressure tightening around my mouth disappeared. "*@#@#." An incomprehensible voice pulled my body up. My neck was still itchy.

"Cap#@%^! Danger...!"

"#@%^%$. @%%@#$ danger@%%@#$? It's only a panic%&$^#$. You #$%&%."

"#$%"

I could breathe again. But it was still suffocating. It felt like something was still there.

I tried to rub my neck against my shoulder to find whatever it was that might or might not have been there. SLASH! But before I could succeed, the sensation binding my arms disappeared first.

My hands quickly moved to my neck.

"%%^#$."

"%&$^#$."

It's itchy. I said it's itchy...

I tore off the bandages with my fingertips and scratched my neck. The chunk of metal around my neck was already gone, yet it was strangely hard to breathe. It felt like something was still there. It's itchy.

"Tsk. Did you @%%@#$know @%%@#$?"

"...this@% severe#$@^$."

"#@$and, stop talk$#^."

"Well, seeing similar^$#@, it would be better not to $%^# #@$%?"

"At this rat#@, it seems lik#@$% on his neck#@$%."

"We have to endur#@$. $#@^@# if we touch it wrong#$@# @#$%people will get more hur#@. @#$Even so #$@^ that side is $@# stronger than #$@ &^$$#."

SCRAPE. Warm liquid finally touched my fingertips. It was still suffocating. I felt like if I peeled all the skin off, it would prove that nothing was there. I dug my nails in deeper.

Only after droplets of blood had almost completely soaked my fingers did the itchiness subside a little.

"...better not to touch the neck."

It was around then that the voices of the people nearby started to sound clear. I focused for a moment to understand the words filtering through my tinnitus. Touch. Better. Those were the two words I managed to catch.

"B-Boss."

The rest was a little better. I stopped focusing on the words and realized that the owner of that voice was quite familiar.

So he was alive.

"I-I'll take off your blindfold, so..."

RIIIIING. The voice heard through the tinnitus was quite cautious. A faint presence touched the corner of my eyes. SWISH. The piece of cloth blocking my eyes slid down.

"B-Boss."

Then, behind the haggard Deathbringer, I saw soldiers and Inquisitors holding weapons. There were Priests, Mages, and Knights, too.

Except they were all stricken with fear.

"Boss, are you ok..."

"How many did I kill?"

From that sight, I reached a realization that was close to certainty.

"How many did I kill?"

It seemed I would have to die here after all.