“Hey, Azi!”

“Woof...”

“Did I or did I not tell you to stop sneaking food!”

I scolded Azi with a show of anger. With no excuse to offer this time, her eyes darted about.

Last time, accusing her without evidence had backfired, but this time was different. I had caught her prowling around the dining hall and lifting a pot lid when it wasn't even mealtime.

In other words, she had been caught red-handed at the scene.

“I thought food had been going missing at night lately! So it was you!”

“Woof? Me, not a thief!”

“Don't talk back!”

After that sharp rebuke, I left Azi where she was and headed for the stove.

“If you're hungry, just tell me! Then I'll—”

SHHHH.

Golden, gleaming rice came into view. Immortal rice, supposedly so filling that a single grain was as good as a whole meal. That was an exaggeration, but it was an excellent ingredient all the same.

I had mixed the immortal rice with mashed beans, slowly adding stock made with herbs and meat as it simmered into a risotto. It might have looked like dog slop, but still.

I scooped out a fresh portion and lightly stir-fried it in a pan.

I didn't use much oil. Azi wasn't fond of greasy food. Instead, I mixed in some canned-bean soup from the stockpot to thicken it, then served it on a plate.

Now accustomed to eating at the table with us, Azi immediately took a seat. I set the plate before her and rang the bell.

DING.

“That way I can warm it up for you!”

“Woof, woof!”

At the bell, which had now become her signal, Azi's eyes sparkled and she immediately buried her face in the plate.

What was that saying about a full granary breeding generosity? Thanks to the Regressor's investment, we had acquired more luxurious ingredients than ever before and started squandering them like the nouveau riche.

Our initial caution around ingredients we had only heard rumors of didn't last long. Already accustomed to them, we abandoned our conservative ways and embraced progress. We feared no failures, cheered on novel experiments, and threw thrift out the window.

Since I was serving Azi anyway, I put some risotto on a plate for myself and took a spoonful. Its flavor wasn't refined, but the wild exuberance produced by lavish quantities of premium ingredients was impressive.

“With ingredients this good, even dog food tastes great.”

I'd been a bit wasteful this time. Maybe I should make something a little more reliable next.

Even if it turned out inedible, I could always give it to Azi or Nabi.

“Meow. It's still dog food, meow.”

It was then that Nabi, who had appeared in the dining hall without my noticing, licked her forepaw. She frowned at the food in the pot and frying pan.

“Meooow. Not a single dish here appeals to me, meow. Only a stupid doggy would enjoy eating this. It's too low-quality to pass my lips, meow.”

I tilted my head and asked,

“Didn't Shei give you your medicine? Why come all the way here to throw a fit?”

“I'm complaining about the food, servant! I can only force myself to eat it so many times, meow!”

“You're calling me a servant? You, an animal?”

“What else would you call someone who prepares food and does chores, meow!”

Nabi waved a forepaw irritably.

It wasn't that I didn't understand. Nabi was a carnivore. She simply wouldn't eat anything that wasn't meat. We had more grain than meat, so I had mostly been using that. She must have come to complain about the grain-heavy diet.

Of course, that didn't mean I had any reason to indulge some junkie cat. I gestured to Azi, who swallowed the food in her mouth and stood up.

Nabi continued complaining about the food, oblivious to the shadow falling over her from behind.

“Meooow! I've put up with enough, meow! For the next meal, something more suited to my—”

“Nom.”

“Mreeow?!”

Having crept up behind her, Azi bit Nabi's neck. With her life suddenly in another's jaws, Nabi's fur stood on end, and she froze as though she had been stuffed. Only her eyes moved, rolling about anxiously.

Having subdued Nabi in an instant through Azi, I walked over, rolling my neck from side to side.

“Listen here, you little brat. If our investor hadn't supplied us with so many ingredients, you'd have been the first one kicked out.”

“Meoow. Meoow. Meoow...”

I advanced menacingly toward the pitifully mewling Nabi and reached inside my clothes. Her eyes grew even wider.

“But even if you forget your own birthday, you have to remember the birthday of a high official's dog. I can't go mistreating our investor's pet.”

What I took out was a tin can. But it didn't contain cooked chimera beans.

The Military State's special compressed canned rations came in cans that anyone versed in alchemy could reuse. I opened the can I had spent last night preparing and held it out to Nabi.

Inside was a special treat for cats: wet meat food made by mixing salted meat with canned beans and thinning it down.

“Meoow?”

“Going to all the trouble of cooking something separately for a mere animal is practically a disgrace to humanity... I'd normally never do this, but understand that I'm making a special exception for our sponsor. Got it?”

“Meow...”

When I held out the can, Nabi stuck out her tongue to taste it, even with Azi's jaws still around the back of her neck. Evidently pleased, she began lapping at it incessantly.

With Nabi completely absorbed in her treat, Azi found herself at a loose end and slowly released her neck. Then she stared at me and barked reproachfully.

“Woof...”

“Huh? Hey, what's wrong?”

“I listen... I'm good... Woof... But...”

Azi gazed at Nabi and the can with such hurt that she looked as if the whole world had betrayed her.

Dumbfounded, I asked,

“You sit at the table and eat the same meals we do. You even eat with us.”

“Woof! That's a meal! This is a treat! Woof, woof!”

“Oh, so a dog distinguishes between meals and treats now? Just eat whatever the hell you're given.”

This was why you shouldn't be nice to animals in the first place. I should have kept them in line from the start.

With a sigh, I slowly moved the can in my hand. Nabi's face followed as though glued to it. When I set it on the table, she ended up with her face planted there too.

Then I took another can out of my clothes and handed it over.

“... Fine. You can have some too, you pig. But I'll only open it once you've finished your meal.”

“Okay! Woof!”

As though even barking was a waste of time, Azi immediately began smacking her lips over the food on her plate, a forepaw resting protectively on her can.

What was I supposed to do with these beasts? Just as I sighed again,

the undying one and Callis entered the dining hall.

She had recovered enough to be up and about, but walking unaided was still too much for her, so she continued to lean on the undying one for support...

'Rash is a barbarian in name only. He doesn't object to physical contact, but he's far too considerate. I've recovered enough to do calisthenics, but until I'm fully healed, I'll keep pretending otherwise and stay close to him. Three months. That should be enough time to...'

Anyway, that was how things stood.

Oblivious to Callis's thoughts, the undying one strode into the dining hall.

“What's this! You're all eating already! Is it mealtime so soon?”

“What do animals care about mealtimes? If there's food in front of them, they eat.”

I glared at the two animals sitting companionably at the table, stuffing their faces with treats. The undying one laughed heartily.

“Haha! They certainly have healthy appetites. You'll be blessed for this, Instructor! They say that kindness shown to beast maidens has always been repaid twofold!”

“I don't even have any kindness to spare for myself. Why would I waste it on animals? I just give them the leftovers.”

“You draw a sharp distinction! I doubt anyone else sees these beast maidens quite so thoroughly as beasts!”

“They're Beast Kings. They're animals, I'm telling you.”

After carefully settling Callis in a chair as we talked, Rash headed over to the pot. He spoke as he served food onto a plate.

“But they're maidens who have taken human form to converse with humans! You can talk to them and understand their intentions. How can you treat them exactly like animals?”

“Rash, how would you treat a letter if it stood up and started talking?”

“I don't think I could treat it like a letter!”

“But you wouldn't treat it like a human either. It's like that.”

The undying one scratched his head.

“Haha! You've got me there! Are all people from the Military State as eloquent as you, Instructor?”

“Yes. I'm perfectly average for the Military State.”

'Liar...!'

An impudent thought came from Callis.

What's your problem? It's better than your lie. You've recovered enough to do those Military State regulation calisthenics, yet you're still pretending to be ill.

“Callis! Can you manage solid food today?”

At the undying one's question, Callis deliberately delayed her answer, pretending it took great effort.

“Rash, I... Ugh. Soup, please.”

“Still not fully recovered? Goodness. This is why those who die easily need to be careful.”

Shaking his head, the undying one ladled bean soup from the large stockpot into a bowl. He set it before Callis with a spoon and asked,

“Well, can you eat on your own?”

Callis raised a hand. It trembled weakly, as though her body had yet to recover...

The trembling was a little too artificial for that, but the undying one had never experienced shaky hands and failed to notice.

After trying and giving up on taking hold of the spoon, Callis looked at Azi and Nabi scraping their cans clean at one end of the table and murmured,

“... It's all right. If I lean down and eat like the Beast Kings... Ugh.”

“Goodness. How is someone who's been stabbed in the stomach supposed to bend over to eat?”

Clicking his tongue, the undying one picked up the spoon. He filled it with soup and brought it smoothly to Callis's mouth with a delicacy at odds with his burly frame. The rippling soup stopped just short of her lips without spilling a drop.

“Thank you...”

“Go ahead. Ah, it may be hot, so let it cool before you eat. I'm not a good judge of how dangerous hot things are.”

“But your arm will get sore...”

The undying one shook his head vigorously. Despite the violent motion, the spoon didn't budge.

“I'm undying. I neither suffer injury nor tire. I've never experienced a sore or numb arm. Sometimes I don't even know whether my right arm is attached.”

“... That's...”

“My point is, I can hold a spoon up as long as you like! Let it cool to your heart's content!”

At that small act of consideration, so full of warmth, Callis's expression briefly clouded.

'... He's far too good for me. But I'm used to dreaming beyond my station. And to make that dream come true...'

Having made up her mind, Callis opened her mouth and extended her tongue, slowly running it along the spoon, starting from the underside.

The undying one didn't show it, but the movement made him a little self-conscious.

'... Do all Military State officers eat like this? Officers take it even further, then. I thought everyone else ate normally!'

'Soup really isn't enough... I need to come back tonight and sneak some more food so I can recover quickly and make our relationship a fait accompli.'

So it was you. You were the one sneaking food at night.

Good grief. Still, at least the person eating it was someone who needed to eat. The number of mouths to feed hadn't changed, after all. As guardian of the dining hall, I could tolerate that.

I got up first and was taking my empty plate over to the sink when Tyr entered the dining hall, accompanied by a coffin painted pitch-black.