After gathering all the trainees in the classroom, I clapped my hands to begin the lesson.

"All right, let's have a lesson. It's been a while. But before we begin."

Once again, the vampire was using her floating coffin instead of a chair. Beside it stood Finlay, hands clasped, as though his attendance were a matter of course.

I pointed at him with an irritated look.

"Trainee Tyrkanzyaka. Can't you do something about that thing standing beside you?"

Finlay immediately flared up at my question.

"How dare you! The noble Progenitor must always be accompanied by a servant to perform unpleasant tasks on her behalf. I shall quietly fulfill my duties, so you need only fulfill yours! If we both do our duty, there will be no problem!"

That, from the man who interrupted every single day with his indignant outbursts in the name of duty? Any way I looked at it, he seemed to be declaring his intention to disrupt my lessons to the best of his ability.

As I stared at him coldly, the vampire admonished him.

"Enough, Finlay."

As though he hadn't just been shouting, Finlay promptly dropped to one knee. His attitude was the complete opposite of how he treated me. Of course, that contrast wasn't entirely unintentional.

He treated us differently to elevate the vampire above me. That would make her more indulgent toward him.

In any case, after silencing Finlay with a single remark, the vampire addressed me.

"Please understand. He seems curious about the contents of this lesson as well."

"Understand? What are you talking about? Does being curious give anyone the right to barge in and make unreasonable demands?"

I set the chalk down with a sharp clack and glared at Finlay.

"Finlay. This lesson was prepared exclusively for the trainees. Would outsiders kindly leave?"

"I am the Progenitor's attendant, a drop of blood she has left in this world! When she needs me, it is my duty to offer my own blood to exalt her!"

"I am an Instructor of the Military State. That means I'm the administrator here. If you refuse to listen to me..."

"If I refuse?"

With both arms, I swept all the papers off the lectern. Then I flopped down on its newly cleared surface.

Taken aback by my drastic behavior, the vampire reproached me.

"What are you doing? You called everyone here."

"And there's someone here I didn't call."

I propped my head on my hands and whistled leisurely.

"I'm not teaching. I won't interfere with anything from now on. You two vampires can play together to your hearts' content."

Then I abruptly turned toward the blackboard. It was effectively a declaration of a boycott.

Faced with the possible cancellation of the lesson she'd been anticipating, the vampire spoke up in alarm.

"Are you sulking? At your age?"

"I'm not sulking."

"You clearly are. Why are you being so childish?"

"Oh, fine. I am sulking. And what you just said made me twice as sulky. No more lessons or massages. I'm not doing anything anymore."

Once I took the massages hostage along with the lessons, the vampire was the one growing desperate. She was so anxious that she was now halfway out of her coffin as she spoke.

"What displeases you so much that you insist on being stubborn?"

"Asking someone who's sulking if they're sulking only makes them sulk more. And what, do you think I teach these lessons just for fun? I put time and effort into preparing them. Having someone interrupt every word I say really kills my motivation, you know? Though perhaps the great Progenitor needs a trumpeter to bellow on her behalf."

Anyone who wasn't an idiot would understand what I meant. The vampire might be a little old, but she wasn't an idiot.

A thrall who had come all the way to the bottomless pit, or an Instructor who provided all manner of entertainment. If she had to choose?

As befitted a vampire whose heart had stopped, her decision was swift and cold.

She beckoned to Finlay. He answered her summons with his lips pressed tightly together.

"Wait outside. Do not return until I call for you."

"... As you command."

As her thrall, Finlay obeyed without a moment's hesitation. Though he didn't forget to glare at me on his way out.

Judging by that defiant attitude, he wasn't going to back down quietly. Planning to eavesdrop, are you?

Ha. Not a chance.

"Since you're leaving anyway, go all the way out to the yard over there. No eavesdropping."

"You!"

"Do so. I, too, would prefer that you not stoop to secretly listening in. Such behavior is beneath your dignity. It is the work of filthy informers."

The vampire was speaking to Finlay, but the Regressor sitting over there flinched as though she'd been pricked with a needle. When I looked at her, she averted her eyes.

At least she had some self-awareness. Good to know her conscience hadn't worn away entirely.

"... As you command."

The Progenitor's orders were absolute. He could disobey, but there was no point. The vampire could pinpoint Finlay's blood even at the farthest end of the bottomless pit.

Finlay bowed his head and left, closing the door behind him. Once he was far enough away, the vampire addressed me in a much gentler voice.

"Have I not said I am sorry? Finlay merely cares for me too deeply. I have sent him out now, so tell us the story you prepared for today."

"It's a lesson, not a story. I put a lot of thought into planning these lessons, and you just treat them as interesting stories."

"Very well. Give us your lesson. I should like to study again after so long."

The vampire was doing her best to soothe me, afraid I might sulk even more.

Of course, she cared more about the electric massages and the stories I told in class than she did about me, but so what? Humans were worldly creatures by nature. You couldn't make a living as a mind reader if you let things like that bother you.

"Whew. All right. They say if you coldheartedly turn away an older learner, an ignorant ghost will haunt you for life, so I'll let it slide. Wait, am I already haunted?"

"What was that?"

"All right. Let's begin today's lesson."

Now that Finlay was gone, nothing stood in my way. I sprang up from the lectern and stepped forward.

Before the vampire could fully register what I'd said, I banged hard on the lectern and raised my voice.

"Having observed you all over this time, I've found that despite your many eccentric behaviors, you show no particular deficiencies in your linguistic abilities or capacity for empathy..."

I paused for a beat before continuing.

"Much to my surprise!"

'What bullshit is he going to spout this time?'

A rude thought reached me from the Regressor's mind. Now, now.

"However, you are missing something crucial. Something very precious that every ordinary human possesses. The absence of that one thing is why you struggle to fit into the world. Do you know what it is?"

The vampire tilted her parasol slightly, signaling that she wanted to answer.

I liked that enthusiastic participation. I pointed to her at once.

"Yes, Trainee Tyrkanzyaka!"

"Might it be that we lack common knowledge of the present age?"

Contrary to my expectations, that was a valid point. With no rebuttal to offer, I stroked my chin and nodded.

"Well, that's not entirely wrong either."

"Then you need only teach us more. These lessons have been rather infrequent lately. Are you not being too lazy as an Instructor? If you truly have our interests at heart, arrange these gatherings more often."

"But common knowledge differs between countries, eras, and generations! How can anyone arrogantly presume to define a lack of it? Unfortunately, that isn't the answer I was looking for!"

Whew. Good thing I'd reacted quickly. I'd nearly ended up increasing my teaching hours.

Having nipped the prospect of extra work in the bud, I continued.

"What you lack is an ordinary sense of danger!"

The Regressor, slouching like a delinquent as usual, frowned and echoed my words.

"An ordinary... sense of danger?"

"Precisely. A sense of danger. The part of you that judges whether danger is approaching and keeps you on guard. In that department, either you have a screw loose, or it's been tightened so far that it's damaged your brain."

Neither of them recognized herself in that description. Did they genuinely not know, or were they simply not thinking?

Unable to leave them to figure it out for themselves, I had no choice but to spell it out individually.

"For the record, Trainee Shei is the one whose screw is too tight. Trainee Tyrkanzyaka's is so loose that the whole part has fallen off."

"What?"

"What insolence!"

Their protests erupted simultaneously. Yes, I'd expected that. Fools were incapable of examining themselves, after all.

Then I'd show them the evidence.

"Now, since you still haven't learned to view yourselves objectively, let's try a simulation."

I took out something I'd prepared beneath the lectern: a marionette cobbled together from golem wreckage I'd found in the administration office.

Back when I worked as a magician, I'd put on puppet shows to draw children in. After finishing a short performance, I'd hold out my hat, and their parents, returning from whatever errand they'd gone off on, would drop in a few low-value coins.

It was time to put that experience to use. I raised the marionette, its thin strings attached to a wooden cross, and spoke.

"I thought long and hard about why you lack an ordinary sense of danger. After much deliberation, I've identified your problems and prepared some scenarios to demonstrate them."

I worked my fingers to control the marionette. Roughly a third of my height, it moved at my gestures.

I had it scratch its head with its left hand and kick its legs in a dance. After trying out all sorts of movements until I had a sufficient feel for it, I brought the marionette to a halt and spoke.

"I'll use this puppet fellow, Mr. Puppetto for short, to set up a scenario. All you need to do is respond appropriately to the situation you're given."

"It's not like we're children..."

"Then please stop making me teach lessons meant for children. Now, I'll demonstrate! Azi!"

"Woof!"

At my call, Azi immediately stood and came over.

She'd already been intensely curious about my marionette for a while. As I swayed Mr. Puppetto back and forth, her gaze followed him.

"Now, this golem is going to talk to you. You just need to give an appropriate, socially acceptable answer. Understand?"

"Woof?"

"Yes. Even that will do. Let's begin!"

Mr. Puppetto waved his right hand. Azi's head swayed left and right with it. When he held out his hand, she held hers out to meet it.

Having captured her attention, I spoke through ventriloquism.

"Hello there, little one."

"Woof! Hello!"