“Hello, Captain AB! Long time no see!”

The golem bound in shadows raised its head at my voice.

It was quite a sight. Dozens of pitch-black shadow whips were tugging at its body like a toy. Had those pulling forces not maintained an exquisite equilibrium, its entire body would have been torn apart.

Fire was the way to sever shadows. I conjured a flame on my finger with standard-issue magic and cut them away one by one.

“Oh, sorry. Something came up and I had to step away, so I tied your legs for a bit in case you fell off the cupboard... But you're tied up more prettily than before, aren't you? I wonder what kind soul did that?”

Now, let's hear what she has to say to my dog-brained nonsense.

When I fitted the speaker into its empty mouth, an unpleasant noise began coming through from far away.

GRIND... GRIT...

“Wow. A golem grinding its teeth! It doesn't even have teeth, but it's grinding them!”

The golem ground its teeth as though even grinding me up and drinking me wouldn't satisfy it.

But resources that can't be replaced are precious. Permanent teeth included.

After I waited a moment, the golem stopped grinding and spoke in a halting voice.

『... I will, never... forget your, conduct.』

“Oh, come on. I was just being considerate, letting you stretch while I was away.”

『Because of that, I...』

GRIIIIND...

This was entertaining, but not being able to read her thoughts took some of the fun out of it.

I decided that was enough teasing and got down to business.

“Anyway, how could you call in an officer just because I tried to dig up an escape route? You're being so cold. That's why I'm treating you like this.”

『... You tried to extract information about escaping right in front of me, and you have the gall to complain that I'm cold?』

“I'm allowed to be curious. You were curious about getting out of that cupboard too, weren't you, Captain AB? I hear you negotiated with Tyr... Though you were a step too late.”

『Then we're even. Neither you nor I managed to learn how to escape.』

Was it her experience as a communications officer? She wouldn't let a single remark go unanswered.

I couldn't read her mind, and she was thoroughly on guard. Would poking at her get me anything?

Well, I might as well try.

“Seeing how determined you are not to tell me, I suppose it's something even a petty criminal like me could try?”

『Assertion. Impossible. The bottomless pit is not a place a petty criminal like you can escape. I advise you to abandon such futile hopes.』

That sounded like it might be the truth, or just a threat.

Was escaping a riddle anyone could solve once they knew the trick? Or was it a merciless sieve that weeded out the incapable even if they knew the answer?

I didn't know. Because I couldn't read the golem's thoughts.

“How interesting.”

Talking to the golem really was rather entertaining.

Unable to read her thoughts, or even her expressions and gestures, I got to enjoy imagining things and taking guesses. It felt rather like coming across a crossword in the newspaper.

But Captain AB probably didn't feel the same way, did she? Dealing with me must be exhausting. For the woman on the other side of the golem, I was just one of the many problems surrounding her.

『How... did you manage to win over the Progenitor? Progenitor Tyrkanzyaka was so indifferent that she offered no resistance even while being transported to the bottomless pit. Yet she would act on behalf of a mere petty criminal like you?』

“Curious?”

Apparently unwilling to admit she wanted something from me, the golem merely nodded. I grinned and answered with the brightest innocence in the world.

“Not tell~ing!”

『Grr...!』

“Haha. Just kidding. I'll tell you. If she was heartless... wouldn't giving her a heart do the trick? Hahaha!”

『... What a remarkably advanced joke. In terms of the age of its intended audience, that is!』

Sometimes people won't believe you even when you tell them the truth. I really did make her heart beat, you know?

Well, if she wouldn't believe me, there was nothing I could do. Their loss.

“Even without anything special, wouldn't spending a few months together in an isolated place bring people closer? Like us?”

『You've just supplied your own counterexample. In any case, understood.』

The golem must have decided I wouldn't tell her any more, because she readily dropped her questions. Instead, she stood up on her own two legs and looked up at me.

『Request. Please guide this unit to Lieutenant Colonel Callis.』

“Lieutenant Colonel Callis? You mean the real Instructor who just arrived?”

『The newly arrived Instructor...?』

The golem sounded puzzled for a moment, then nodded as though she understood.

『Lieutenant Colonel Callis is not an Instruc... No, think of her that way. It makes little difference.』

“Little difference? Is Lieutenant Colonel Callis a fake Instructor like me?”

It had been an offhand remark, but the golem erupted.

『Make a sensible comparison! Unlike you, a Level 0 citizen, she graduated from the advanced military academy with excellent marks! When you do it, it's impersonation. When Lieutenant Colonel Callis does it, it's an appointment!』

“Oh, there's no need to get angry.”

What, she wasn't an Instructor? Then why had she come all the way down to Tantalus?

『Lieutenant Colonel Callis came as a supply supervisor and an inspector for this facility. Originally, she was to inspect the area surrounding Tantalus and check the distribution of supplies. However, there appears to have been some misunderstanding, and she descended directly into Tantalus with the supplies, resulting in this situation.』

I blinked, wide-eyed at this unexpected revelation.

“Huh? Really? She fell down here by mistake?”

『Correction. It was a misunderstanding, not a mistake.』

“Same difference. Wow, for someone who looks so strict, she's a real airhead.”

『Negative! I repeat and emphasize: the lieutenant colonel entered Tantalus because of a misunderstanding! She is someone who rose to field rank through distinguished service immediately after receiving her commission. She would never make such a trivial mistake!』

Having defended the officer's dignity to the bitter end, the golem continued.

『In any case, military high command is fully aware of the situation and is discussing a response. Until further orders arrive, regard the lieutenant colonel as the training commander and obey her instructions.』

“All right, all right.”

I answered mildly, smiling. Things were taking a more interesting turn than I had expected.

Because the officer hadn't come here by mistake or through a misunderstanding... She had come deliberately.

It looked like I would need to take a proper look inside her head.

『... I don't know what else you may be plotting, but you won't have such an easy time now. Unlike this unit, Lieutenant Colonel Callis possesses considerable combat strength herself. You can no longer impersonate an Instructor either.』

Seeing my smile, the golem issued a quiet warning.

Honestly, it was enough to make a model prisoner like me weep with injustice. The officer was the one plotting, but I was the one under suspicion.

I tucked Captain AB under my arm and trudged down the corridor.

The convict laborers' quarters occupied one side of the fourth floor, while the other held the facilities needed for daily life. The dining hall, laundry room, supply room, classroom, and so on.

And far beyond the broken bars stood the Instructor's office, with the largest door of all.

However minor their crimes, convict laborers were still prisoners. To prevent them from escaping under cover of night, a barred gate with a large padlock had been installed at the approach to the fourth-floor stairs. It had been smashed into a sorry state during all the chaos, but its remains were still there.

Just as I passed through the broken gate toward the Instructor's office, a black knight rose from my shadow without warning and spoke to me.

“Hugh. There is a Military State soldier in that direction.”

The black knight spoke in Tyr's voice, which was filled with concern.

“It's all right, Tyr. I'm only going to talk for a moment.”

“Be careful. I do not know how strong she is. If her skill is even a quarter of Shei's, the black knight I concealed in your shadow will be no match for her. Even buying time will be difficult.”

If a mere lieutenant colonel were a quarter as strong as the Regressor, the Military State would have conquered the world long ago. I waved a hand to reassure her.

“I told you, it's fine. Don't follow me. There's no telling what she'll do if she gets scared.”

“Very well. I am sure you have something in mind. Still, be careful.”

With that, the black knight vanished back into my shadow. Leaving Tyr's worries behind, I approached the Instructor's office.

I put my mouth close to the firmly shut door and spoke.

“Knock, knock.”

“Enter.”

As soon as permission came, I promptly opened the door and went inside.

The Instructor's office wasn't a living space, so all it contained was a sofa, a chair, and a desk. Tantalus hadn't been designed with an Instructor in mind in the first place.

The officer had scattered all manner of luggage and documents across that empty space. Judging by the broken golem remains among them, she seemed to have stopped by the management office outside.

In the middle of sorting everything out, she saw me and grimaced.

'Tch. I should have made the convict laborer handle these chores. Why is the Progenitor protecting a petty criminal like him?'

Whew. What a relief. I could have ended up hauling all that stuff back and forth to the fourth floor.

Once again congratulating myself on having made the right connections, I held out the golem tucked under my arm.

“Here you go.”

“... What's that?”

“Captain AB. Say hello.”

『I must salute first. Put me down.』

I carefully lowered the squirming golem to the floor. It stood at attention and saluted the officer, palm facing outward.

『Long live the Military State. Communications officer Captain AB reporting. I am responsible for surveillance and communications within Tantalus.』

Though the golem was only a third of a person's height, its salute was impeccable. The sight of that tiny body making such an earnest salute was even rather cute.

But apparently I was the only one who thought so. I heard the officer click her tongue.

'Communications officers. Lucky things, selected and made captains purely for their magical aptitude, without any talent or effort... Tch. Another sham officer.'

Well, well.